Some of the Hardest Years of Life Come from Running Like a Hare When You Were Built to Move Like a Tortoise
Opening
Most people think stress comes from working hard.
Sometimes it comes from working in a way that does not fit who you are.
I learned that lesson the hard way.
Life at the Wrong Pace
In 2011, I was deep in the mortgage business during the difficult years that followed the recession.
The industry was always demanding, but this period felt especially intense.
Customers were anxious.
Contracts felt urgent.
Every file seemed to carry someone’s future with it.
I cared deeply about helping people, and I felt honored by their trust.
But I also felt responsible for everything.
That is a dangerous combination.
When Even Rest Feels Impossible
Lanny and I decided to take a long weekend at the beach.
I needed the break badly.
But the calls did not stop.
The perceived emergencies did not stop.
The pressure followed me there.
Instead of resting, I worked the whole trip while growing increasingly resentful that I could not unplug.
Then I felt guilty for resenting the very people who trusted me.
By the time we came home, I wished we had never gone.
When the Body Draws the Boundary
A few days later, I developed the worst headache of my life.
Then one morning, I looked in the mirror and saw the right side of my face beginning to collapse.
I was later diagnosed with Bell’s palsy, along with severe nerve pain that made even sleep nearly impossible.
The pain was relentless.
The fear was worse.
For a woman, seeing half your face appearing to melt off is psychologically devastating.
I was frightened, embarrassed, exhausted, and still trying to keep working.
Looking back, I can see something clearly now:
My body drew a boundary I had refused to draw for myself.
The Real Problem Was Not Work
The real problem was not hard work.
It was misalignment.
I was operating by a script the industry rewarded:
Be available constantly.
Move faster.
Carry more.
Absorb everyone else’s urgency.
But that was never my nature.
The Tortoise I Left Behind
We all know the story of the tortoise and the hare.
I was always the tortoise.
I like to understand before moving forward.
I prepare carefully.
I build steadily.
I move with intention.
Yet I spent years trying to become the hare:
Fast.
Reactive.
Always on.
Winning everyone else’s race.
I paid dearly for that mistake.
So I began working backwards to find the tortoise I had left in the dust trying to be a hare.
What Changed
That experience changed how I ran my business.
It changed my boundaries.
It changed the pace I accepted for myself.
It changed how much of myself I gave away before protecting what I needed to sustain.
Recovery took months.
The lesson has lasted years.
Even now, if I feel tension building, I pay attention much sooner.
Quiet Signals Become Loud Ones
As painful as that season was, I am grateful for it.
My body had been sending quiet signals for a long time.
I ignored them.
Eventually, it had to shout.
Closing
Many of the hardest years of life come from trying to perform someone else’s script.
Sometimes the second half of life is when we finally stop.
And begin living at the pace that was ours all along.
— Jamie Harrington
Freedom to Thrive
Curious explorer of living well in the second half of life.
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